Operation Sour F*cking Grapes

I've honestly never witnessed a more deluded group of individuals. Honestly. Their boot-strap logic is based in conspiracy theory upon rumor upon propaganda. I don't know how they live their lives without their brains imploding. They are so angry and bitter. What amuses me the most about them is the different systems of government they advocate. Anarchy and socialism seem to be the preferences, yet they seemingly have no idea how diametrically opposed they are. I got into a conversation with a self-proclaimed anarchist. He was riding around on his little tricycle and wearing a black bandana around his whole face and head. He smelled like hell because it is hot in Houston, and he seemed to think that anarchy would provide him with more opportunity than any government.

Refraining from pointing out that a nice long shower might have a far more positive effect than anarchy, I said, "No, it would provide me with more opportunity because I'm smarter than you, I have a work ethic, and I am infinitely more likeable. If we were to have anarchy, you'd be the first over a barrel because you are weak, you have no desire to work, and you rely on the paranoia of others for your information. Those in power today who have the drive to succeed and no scruples would still be in power only there would be no way to check it."

I got into another conversation with a "journalist" for the local "progressive" radio station. He said we were in a "pre-fascist" society because we were nationalistic. He said nationalism (read patriotism) was a bad thing because it always translated into aggression against other countries. So according to him, it is not a good thing to be proud of being an American. Dare I call him anti-American now?

I told him that I was extremely proud of my country because of the freedoms we have. I'm in an interracial marriage and live without fear of persecution from the government, we have no gulags or concentration camps, our economic system is the envy of the world, we have people selling their souls to get here...what is not to be proud of?

He never really answered the question and moved on to our presence in Iraq. He seemed to think that because America didn't remove Saddam 12 years ago, we had no right to do it now. Well, I'm the first to wish we had done it then, but better late than never, and hopefully we can prove to the Shiites that we will not forsake them. He remained convinced that despite all evidence to the contrary, the insurgency in Iraq is made up of Iraqis. No amount of evidence would make him believe otherwise. The fact that Zarqawi is not an Iraqi, the fact that even the Sunnis in Fallujah were happy to see them cleared out, and the fact that we have caught more Iranians and Syrians than even former Baathists, was like water off a duck's back.

He then asked when we had ever been successful in a country where the people were not in favor of us being there. I said Japan. We nuked them, took control, and forced democracy upon them and today they are a gigantic economy and the envy of Asia. He wasn't terribly pleased with that example and he tried to change the subject while I ticked off Germany and South Korea.

I was mildly impressed though. The dude knew something of history except that it was a revisionist history that ignored all empirical evidence of economic success and humanitarian improvements. It is difficult to convince people that socialism is the cure for all the world's ills when it has only ever proven to be disastrous, but you have to give them credit for trying. Hopefully success in Iraq and Afghanistan and elsewhere in the Middle East will prove once and for all that socialism is a failure.

The funniest moments of the day were when one of our members, Scooter, who is black, started calling the "pacifists" racists. He asked (at my prompting), "Are the Iraqis too dark to vote? Are they too brown-skinned to have freedom? It doesn't matter if Saddam tortures them because they're not white. Y'all are a bunch of racists."

Then he started chanting "Whitey Go Home!" to our cheers. What was so amusing was that they really were all white. Oh, there was a minority here and there, but mostly they were rabid, frothing, foaming white people. I've never been so ashamed of my race.

The shame continued when the young white folks who were so concerned with the fate of the world decided to bring attention to the serious plight of the oppressed by challenging the Protest Warriors to a "dance off." I implored the to wait until we had our cameras ready so we could make fun of them later, and for some reason they complied. Let's just say we won by keeping still. I'm not sure what they proved by making asses out of themselves, but as long as they were amusing us instead of assaulting us I was alright with it. But a bit of free advice to anyone contemplating bringing attention to their issue by making themselves look an asshole to the general population: You are not brave or edgy. You are stupid.

I can't leave off without commending the Houston police officers who came out for our protection. They were respectful of both sides, but each had their individual ways of letting us know what they thought of the moonbats. They went above and beyond the call of duty to keep us safe and I thank them for it.